


diary entries

by JAEMREN_ch1ld



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: But maybe not, Diary, First Kiss, Happy Ending, High School, M/M, alone renjun, basketball player jaemin, jaemren, najun - Freeform, renjun just wants to be alone, renmin, small story line, this is not fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:35:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24238909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JAEMREN_ch1ld/pseuds/JAEMREN_ch1ld
Summary: renjun just wanted to keep his thoughts for himself and his diary but jaemin have other plans.orjaemin was just too curious of his neighbor.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Na Jaemin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 54





	diary entries

**Author's Note:**

> i made a short renmin fanfic bc i miss them already and to celebrate the goodbye stage of ridin' hdksjdjsk i'm still sad about it but i need to be happy

renjun owned a significant piece of paper, binded together with his thoughts and slight regrets. he owned a book-like paper that stored a partial remembrance from his memories, flowing like a smooth but tight memory. renjun owned an old diary that kept his unanswered questions listed, he planned to answer it by the near future.

recollecting memories were tough but renjun managed to do so, a small glimpse of his life was written so perfectly on his old and almost dishelved diary. he loved it nonetheless, the old and wood scented diary of his made him feel secured and collected. 

the tattered pages were so fragile, renjun didn't bother re-reading his pass diary entries, the pages would count up to 300 if renjun would count it back to back, every letter were written small to accomodate renjun's talkative entries. renjun started writing on his old diary when he was just 8 years old. he found solace while writing and his diary became his best friend.

but these days... no weeks, were filled with the same name of the guy he had been pining for. renjun talked about him non-stop, his letters became relatively smaller and harder to read. renjun wanted to shout his insane crush to the guy but his own guts and ego would not let him do that. 

though renjun really liked the guy, he was satisfied with this kind of love. a quiet but powerful kind of love, he would never confess to the guy but would never lessen the like he had for the guy.

renjun just finished writing one of his entries and happily closed his diary. he was estatic, it was the first time the guy talked to him and he could never forget the small yet radiant smile the guy have him, it will be engraved inside his mind and heart until the day he die. 

renjun was happy with this. small interactions that leaves a deep meaning to him, it was like a huge surge or undeniable feeling of butterflies playing in his stomach. but renjun doesn't jump to assumptions, he flatly enjoyed this type of crush or he what he liked to say.. a happy crush.

renjun closed his eyes and tried remembering the sequence of his unforgettable moment of his life.

_renjun never talked about anything to anyone because he simply didn't need to nor want to, his diary was enough for him. renjun didn't really took a liking of the idea of friendship because for him it was just a plain and obvious energy sucker. he liked being alone, just like what he was doing right now._

_he was alone and very very contented._

_renjun was at the third row bleachers, watching the basketball players tire their self out. he was watching but his earphones were in his ears, blasting a heavy metal rock song. renjun was nodding to the beat while enjoying the sight of the players training to their heart's content._

_but among all those players, someone caught his eyes...no he was intently watching him from the start._

_na jaemin, the star of the basketball team._

_renjun observed and squeeled inside his mind whenever jaemin received the ball and dribble it to their court. renjun was amazed to how fast and gorgeous jaemin was when he play paired with the black jerseys and sweating forehead._

_renjun almost clapped his hands right when jaemin shoot a three point but he held it in because it will be too embarassing. he was not the only one inside the gym, actually there's a lot of students inside too and creating a scene would not be really a good idea for him and his confidence._

_renjun turned off his music when the coach whistled stop to his players, they all gathered around their coach which was not too far from where renjun was sitting. renjun watched them nod their heads with intense as if the words of their coach were bible verses._

_renjun was supposed to stand up when the players shouted their usual chant of;_

_“ north side high school! smooth win!”_

_to which sounded stupid to renjun._

_renjun grabbed his bag when someone stopped him and renjun wanted to cuss him out but when he saw it was the na jaemin, his crush and the star player, his frown instantly vanished and was replaced with a soft look._

_“ renjun, my mom wants you to come later, is it okay?” jaemin talked withing his fast breaths and renjun noticed he was trying to regain his stable breathing._

_renjun nodded his head. it was true that his neighbor was jaemin or the na's. they were basically neighbors since they were a baby but renjun liked to keep himself just for himself so he didn't really sparked a cute little friendship with the guy in front of him._

_“ great. i'll see you later.” jaemin gave him a small smile before leaving him with his twisted and confused thoughts._

renjun felt like the world favored him for a day. it was the first time jaemin talked to him and was even the one to invite him to his house. renjun helped jaemin's mother in picking up pretty flowers for her little obsession for decorating their home and renjun gladly helped her since he liked her son and flowers were his representative moods always.

renjun heard the doorbell rung three times, it must be jaemin. 

renjun went down to their living room to see jaemin with his usual basketball shorts and black t-shirt and a pair of slides. renjun liked the comfortable clothing, he took note in his mind to write it on his diary later. 

“ hey! let's go!”

renjun just nodded and went straight to jaemin's house with jaemin leading him. renjun was supposed to go their front door but jaemin went to their backyard and renjun followed him closely.

renjun heard noises from the backyard, he saw jaemin's basketball friends. they all stopped talking and diverted into looking at renjun which made renjun weirdly uncomfortable. jaemin guided him to their back garden, 

“ my mom is her usual place, you can just go there directly.” he said with his usual deep voice, renjun shivered but immediately nodded. 

another entry for his wicked diary.

___________

a week later, it was renjun's birthday.

renjun didn't want to celebrate it because he found it rather tiring and very boring but his parents were very persistent so he agreed. renjun didn't want to ignite their usual banter of opinion so he just let them decide what's gonna happen in his  _**beloved**_ birthday .

their doorbell rung. renjun wasn't expecting any visitors aside from his cousin, chenle. renjun didn't answer it right away, confusion still lingering inside his mind. 

he heard the clanging of the utensils coming out from the kitchen and he saw his mom, with her polkadots apron, “ open it, it must be the na's!” his mother excitedly said.

renjun widened his eyes and a small gasp left his mouth. “ you invited them?” renjun felt a wave of nervousness and anxiety because it if was the na's then jaemin will be there. 

“ yes. so get the door.” his mother instructed sassily before going back to their kitchen to prepare the other foods needed for their celebration.

renjun huffed and stood up, he was anxious but the need to stay calm and collected was occupying his mind too. he opened them and he was greeted with the bright smiles of the na's.

jaemin's mother and father gave him a smile before coming in, jaemin's little sister hugged renjun before going inside too. he was now left with jaemin who was looking bored and uninterested. 

“ come in.” renjun only said, moving aside to create a small path for jaemin. jaemin entered, his hands both inside his pockets. renjun closed the door and silently followed him. 

renjun was fidgeting his hands, he was nowhere expecting this because his mother said that only his family will be invited. the na's weren't even close to their bloodline yet they were here, inside renjun's spacious living room. 

“ happy birthday renjun!” jaemin's mom greeted him again and renjun returned it with a small thank you.

renjun's mom came out of the kitchen, she looked exhausted but still managed to act elegant with her nude dress and sparkling earrings. renjun wanted to slap himself when his mother gave an awful suggestion for him to do. 

“ the food is still not ready so these boys might get bored. ren, why don't you guide jaemin to your room and play the piano for him?” his mom suggested with a hint of order and renjun could only nod because just like earlier, he doesn't want any usual banter with his mom. 

“ follow me, jaemin.” renjun said before climbing up to his room.

he opened the door to his room which was located at the farthest part of the hallway. “ come in.” renjun said once again,

jaemin entered, eyes searching for the instrument renjun's mom suggested. 

“ it's right there. “ renjun pointed at the piano. renjun pulled his swivel chair from his desk and and gestured jaemin to sit down. 

renjun noticed the change of demeanour of jaemin, from looking bored to looking very giddy..

renjun let it slip from his mind and sat on the chair. renjun was nervous. hell, his fingers felt frozen when he entered his room and the air condition unit was not even on. renjun felt like the whole universe was agreeing too much to this big favor, he didn't even want to think of the alternative reasons to why this lucky day existed.

this was another entry for his diary and renjun was sure it will be the most important one and the smallest letters will come out. 

“ aren't you gonna play anything?” jaemin asked, voice hinting a sound of interest and desperation. renjun looked behind only to see jaemin watching him carefully. renjun nodded and started playing the keys of his piano.

it was mesmerizing for jaemin and he wouldn't lie, renjun was good...excellent if he may say. renjun played well and jaemin was sold, his attention was into renjun. 

renjun played two different jazz pieces and when he was done, jaemin clapped his hands slowly. renjun gave him a small smile before standing up and reaching out to the door. “ i'll get us some drinks.” renjun said before closing the door.

jaemin sighed and smiled, the most beautiful one to say the least.

once renjun was off the room, he slowly walked through the wheels of renjun's swivel chair to renjun's desk. he finally saw the thing he was looking for years.

renjun's diary..

————

right when renjun got back to him room, thoughts finally collected and very calm. he carefully opened his door because he was holding two glasses of pineapple juice with his hands, only to drop it when he saw jaemin reading the last pages of his diary..

“ why are you reading that?” renjun shouted but before he could even grasp his diary out of jaemin's hold, jaemin recited the words renjun wrote dearly. 

“ his small smile made me feel like the stars are vibrant. his voice made me lose my conciousness for a moment because it sounded dreamy and very deep. his eyelashes were so long, i can't stop myself from looking at it. he was gorgeous. who am i kidding? na jaemin has never been ugly before.” jaemin finished it with a smirk plastered on his face. 

renjun grabbed the big diary from jaemin's hold and carefully closed it. renjun put the diary back to his shelf, slowly because he didn't want to face jaemin yet. 

“ so you like me?” jaemin started. there was a weird excitement lingering on jaemin's voice and renjun couldn't figure it out why. 

renjun slowly turned around and as soon as he do so, jaemin was now in front of him. sitting on renjun's swivel chair and looking up at renjun with the biggest smirk on his face. 

“ you like me right.” jaemin asked again.

renjun didn't know what to do, he felt cornered. jaemin just invaded his privacy but he couldn't be bothered to say it because jaemin's name was written there and he was fantazising about jaemin a lot of times too, and it was all written on his diary. 

renjun took a deep breath before nodding his head. 

jaemin chuckled. he grabbed renjun's wrist and drew small circles with his thumb. “ since when?”

“ fourth grade.”

“ really, since we were 9..” jaemin trailed off and renjun was caugh off guard when jaemin pulled him, his back was forced to bent and his eyes went wide. their faces were so near to each other and renjun was painfully nervous.

“ th..this is..awkward, jaemin.” renjun stattered and jaemin laughed.

“ what if i say..” 

renjun's heart started to beat fast, his mouth was getting dry and his breathing was getting rigid, he doesn't know why and how jaemin was doing this but renjun was far from not enjoying this.

jaemin stared at his eyes as if he want to talk with their eyes and be connected to him. 

renjun was about to straight his back when jaemin pulled his neck and kissed him full on the lips. renjun's eyes were circle and he somehow forgot to breathe for a second.

jaemin pulled away and chuckled when renjun was shock frozen, his face was tinted with pink. jaemin stood up and gave him a small peck again.

“ what if i say i like you too?”

“ boys! dinner's ready!”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! leave some kudos if you enjoyed it and please comment huhu
> 
> i'm gonna write more renmin lmao


End file.
